Insight Japan...

i was in japan and it was my first trip there. i've never been there or had any intention. thanx to my public service department, i was able to go there for a course on leadership and learn about this assiduous nation.

My first encounter or knowledge about Japanese was when i was a small girl. Even then...i barely know who they are but i really loved watching 'Oshin". Oshin is a Japanese serial television drama that follows the life of Shin Tanokura during the Meiji period up to the early 1980s. Shin was called "Oshin", which is Japanese archaic cognomen. Oshin, the heroine, serves as a symbolic figure for perseverance, showing that a person should never give up - even in the most trying times.

Besides Oshin, i was also a fan of other japanese shows like "Shogun", "Maero Attack", "kesatria Baja Hitam" and many more. Don't blame me...for i was a child addicted to tv...hehehehe

As soon as i entered my primary & secondary...i learnt how 'creatively' (or is it cunningly?) Japanese masuk Malaya thru Kota Bharu! All the torture warga Malaya went thru semasa penjajahan Jepun. Hmmm...sampai lah kita dijajah semula oleh British.

Being in Japan...saya tengok bagaimana Jepun bangkit selepas peristiwa hitam pengeboman Hiroshima dan Nagasaki. Mereka hilang segala galanya tetapi berbekalkan kecekalan dan sikap tidak berputus asa, mereka telah berjaya bangkit semula sebagai kuasa ekonomi terulung. Saya dapat memahami motif Tun Mahathir memperkenalkan Dasar Pandang Ke Timur. Namun ...kelebihan Jepun terletak pada budaya serta masyarakat homegenusnya. Amat berbeza dengan budaya Malaysia. Kita boleh belajar dan mengaplikasikan apa yang baik mengikut acuan masyarakat kita...

Beyonce - If I Were a Boy

If I were a boy
Even just for a day
I’d roll outta bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted then go
Drink beer with the guys
And chase after girls
I’d kick it with who I wanted
And I’d never get confronted for it.
Cause they’d stick up for me.

[Chorus]
If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man.
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

[Verse]
If I were a boy
I would turn off my phone
Tell everyone it’s broken
So they’d think that I was sleepin’ alone
I’d put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she’d be faithful
Waitin’ for me to come home (to come home)

[Chorus]
If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man.
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted (wanted)
Cause he’s taken you for granted (granted)
And everything you had got destroyed

[Vamp1]
It’s a little too late for you to come back
Say its just a mistake
Think I’d forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong

[Male]
You know when you act like that
I don’t think you realize how it makes me look
or feel

[Beyonce]
Act like what
Why are you so jealous
It’s not like i’m sleeping with the guy

[Male]
What

[Beyonce]
What

[Male]
I said yo
Why are you so jealous
It aint like I’m sleepin with the girl
[Vamp2]
But you’re just a boy
You don’t understand
Yeah you don’t understand
How it feels to love a girl someday
You wish you were a better man
You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you’ve taken her for granted
And everything you have got destroyed
But you’re just a boy

i seek for a samurai...

They say Japan was made by a sword. They say the old gods dipped a coral blade into the ocean, and when they pulled it out four perfect drops fell back into the sea, and those drops became the islands of Japan. I say, Japan was made by a handful of brave men. Warriors, willing to give their lives for what seems to have become a forgotten word: honor.


Japanese...they are an intriguing people. From the moment they wake they devote themselves to the perfection of whatever they pursue. I have never seem such discipline. I am surprised to learn that the word Samurai means, 'to serve'.


What does it mean to be Samurai? To devote yourself utterly to a set of moral principles. To seek a stillness of your mind. And to master the way of the sword.


And so the days of the Samurai had ended. Nations, like men, it is sometimes said, have their own destiny.


Being here...there is some comfort such as the emptyness of the sea. No past, no future. We seek small measure of peace, and only a few of us ever find.I am confronted by the hard truth. The irony in my life was set by me. Everyone is polite. They smile and bow. But beneath their courtesy, i detect a deep reservoir of feeling. They devote in perfection in everything, such discipline.

I'm amazed

Daughtry - What About Now

My current fav track...by C.D

Shadows fill an empty heart

As love is fading,

From all the things that we are

But are not saying.

Can we see beyond the scars

And make it to the dawn?

Change the colors of the sky.

And open up to

The ways you made me feel alive,

The ways I loved you.

For all the things that never died,

To make it through the night,

Love will find you.

What about now?

What about today?

What if you’re making me all that I was meant to be?

What if our love never went away?

What if it’s lost behind words we could never find?

Baby, before it’s too late,

What about now?
The sun is breaking in your eyes

To start a new day.

This broken heart can still survive

With a touch of your grace.

Shadows fade into the light.

I am by your side,

Where love will find you.

Now that we’re here,

Now that we’ve come this far,

Just hold on.

There is nothing to fear,

For I am right beside you.

For all my life,I am yours.

What about now?

What about today?

What if you’re making me all that I was meant to be?

What if our love never went away?

What if it’s lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it’s too late...

What about now?

"Farewell! thou art too dear for my possessing"

The hardest part of any friendship is when it is time to say goodbye. As much as we might like things to stay the same, change is an inevitable part of life. There is a secret that only real friends know and it is this. All the mountains and valleys in the world cannot separate friends whose hearts are as one.

The hardest part of any friendship is when it is time to say goodbye,

and even though I wished I could make you stay,

I know I gotta let you spread your wings and fly.

For life is a journey that needs to be travelled

and I am certain you'd make it through,

I just want you to know and never forget

that I will surely miss you.

So follow your heart and never give up,

as dreams and wishes do come true,

for I know that someday we'll meet again,

so never forget I will be praying for you.

Bye.... D :(

Do You Love Your Job?

Do you love coming to work on Mondays or do you look forward to Fridays ? Well...it can all sum up to one thing...which is how much you love your job..

Here's some tips...How To Love Your Job...

step 01

Find ways of career growth, learning and development. Think of ways you can get a promotion in order to grow within the company. Also ask yourself how you can learn new skills that can contribute to the job you have.

step 02

Find excitement and challenge in what you do. Try to find a new twist on what you do know and/or reinvent yourself. Sometime re-decorating your workspace is all you need

step 03

Find great people. Get to know your colleagues and boss better. Better company makes for a happier work place. If your colleagues or boss do not seem like the type of people you want to be with, get to know your clients. Sometime great clients are reason enough to love your job.

step 04

Find out what makes your boss a good boss. There is a reason why your boss is there in the first place, and you can learn a lot from your boss. If you don’t like what you see, then be your own boss within the company by taking the initiative to start new projects and going above and beyond your duties.

step 05

Have fun on the job, but don’t forget you are there to work.

Source : www.ehow.com

HAVE A NICE DAY AT WORK ;)

the sad september...

Pa,
I always knew that you loved me
I hope you knew that I always loved you too..

*If you've read my blog...you'll know why September hurts me...

the L word...

~Love is not about becoming somebody else's perfect person,

it's about finding someone who helps you becoming the best person you can be~

Life is simple, its just not easy...

I have learned to seek my happiness by limiting my desires,

rather than attempting to satisfy them

~John Stuart Mills~

Take a bow...

The flowers are all faded now

Along with your letters

They will never see the light of day

Cause I'll never take them out

and there's no turning back

it's for the better baby

I deserve more than empty words and promises

I believed every thing you said

And I gave you the best I had

So take a bow

Cause you've taken everything else

You played the part and like a star

you played it so well

Take a bow

Cause this scene is coming to an end

I gave you love

All you gave me was pretend

So Now

Take a bow

The future's about to change

Before you know it the curtain closes

Take a look around

There's no one in the crowd

I'm throwing away the pain

And you should know that your performance

It made me stronger now

Well it must have been sleight hand

Cause I still can't understand

how I could never see

Just what a fool believed

but the lies they start to show

tell me how it feels to know right now

that I wont be around

so baby

before I put you out

~Leona Lewis~

Pain is inevitable...suffering is optional

Many of my friends have fallen in love again and again only to grow apart and feel the sadness that love tends to give after it goes away. Love hurts through different ways, you can be in love and with the one you love and still be hurt, or a breakup in a relationship can hurt. It does not take a long time to end a relationship, but it surely takes a lifetime to forget someone you once loved so dearly.

There's a reason i'm writing about this today....it's dedicated to few of my very special friends (u know who u are). One who hides her pain perfectly behind her smiles. It hurt when first love failed but when second failed too...it's unbearable. She loved, she never asked for anything but love in return. She smiled when others got gifts and she didn't, she didn't mind she never had a date, she never had good times yet she stayed by him. Yet...she was hurt when he choose not to appreciate and be the selfish man he is.

Among my friends, she is the best. I personally think any guy who knew her will say the same. She makes them smile. When my girlfrends ask their boyfriends for diamonds, flowers and money...she ask for love and care. Told her to choose her man wise...yet she choose a jerk. Now she's alone, loving it and looking forward to the days of future. She don't mind going back to her empty house and having no one to hold her. I'm proud of her. The strength to overcome her pain...she's working on it..

Anthony Robbins said "the secret of success is learning how to use pain and pleasure instead of having pain and pleasure use you. If you do that, you're in control of your life. If you don't, life controls you." Wonderful! You go girl !

"Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.If you come to fame not understanding who you are, it will define who you are"

Are Leaders Born or Made ?

Shakespeare once said: "Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and somehave greatness thrust upon them". Where as Vince Lombardi quoted that leaders aren't born they are made. And they are made just like anything else, through hard work. And that's the price we'll have to pay to achieve that goal, or any goal.

For me personally no one can give leadership to any other person; you cannot be made into a leader by taking a new assignment or moving to a new position. You can be promoted into being a manager, a vice president, a president, or a dean. You can be elected to Congress, or to the governor’s mansion. You can start your own company, and make yourself chairman of the board. But you cannot make yourself a leader by giving or getting a title. Leadership is not about titles, fame, money, power, or position. It’s about followers. A person is a leader because other people follow the example he or she sets. It really is that simple.

Lao Tzu said go to the people, learn from them. Live with them. Start with what they know. Build with what they have. The best of leaders when the job is done, when the task is accomplished, the people will say we have done it ourselves.

But you can develop your leadership skills. there are leaders everywhere. They are all around. In your personal, professional, or academic, most likely others are watching what you do and say and following your example. Odds are you are leading—influencing the actions and attitudes of those around you—and you don’t even know it.You can start to become a more effective leader right now by simply taking responsibility for the leader you already are.

Mahatma Gandhi quoted the future depends on what we do in the present. - . Now...he was a true leader. He led by setting an example how a leader should be. His modesty was the utmost quality i believe any leaders should have.

Happy Birthday To Me

It's my birthday(on 27th June). A year older, a year wiser (really?). Should i reminisce my life and what's been happening so far ? Well...Ralph Waldo Emerson did say life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood. Very true indeed. Actually i have been looking back quite frequently learning and recovering from mistakes i've made. When it comes to personal development and our lives, the reality is that you can be whoever or whatever you choose to be. If only more of us would believe and act upon this then we would not have the level of apathy and the situation we see in our society. Be grateful for what you have now. As you begin to think about all the things in your life you are grateful for, you will be amazed at the never ending thoughts that come back to you of more things to be grateful for. You have to make a start, and then the law of attraction will receive those grateful thoughts and give you more just like them. Just like Rhonda Byrne said - your life right now is a reflection of your past thoughts. That includes all the great things, and all the things you consider not so great. Since you attract to you what you think about most, it is easy to see what your dominant thoughts have been on every subject of your life, because that is what you have experienced.

So..here's wishing me..Happy Birthday ! May all my best wishes come true. Be Blessed :)

Pssstt...I share birthday with one of my favourite author - Helen Kellar. Yay !

Tribute to my dad...

Clarence B. Kelland once told "my father didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it." It very much reminded me of my father. 15th June 2008 - Father's Day. It's the fourth year we (my sister and I) remember this day without dad by ourside.

Dad...plenty words could be used to describe this man's effect in my life. Reading my blog many knew by now how much his lost affected me. He's been and always will be my HERO besides my mom. Recently i took out old photographs of him and reminisce his life with my sis and mom. It was good i had pictures of him. Until now...deep down in my heart i still think dad is with us. Maybe the reason being i didn't have the proper closure. Like mom, dad has been the strength and guidance in my life. How true dad's words were when he said: all children must look after their own upbringing. Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands. Losing him suddenly tore our life apart...and being a close knit it left a hole in my family. I can never thank my dad enough and seek forgiveness for all the things i've done...i can never say how much i love him and miss him...i can never say how much i need him now...it hurts....

Dad, I had to kiss you,

it was a must,

but you were so cold,

thats what let me know it was true,

Dad im so sorry

I couldn't get there in time to say good bye to you.

I knew you were sick but I never expected you to go so fast,

The illness worked so quickly,

you tried so hard, you just couldn't last.

I love you so much and you will always be in my heart,

you see even though you may be gone we will never be apart.

But one last thing I have to say before I go,

Happy Fathers day dad, from me to you!

A beautiful saying...

"It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, (protecting its sanity), covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens.

But, it is never gone."

~Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy~

my mom...

May is a wonderful month. It's not only a month to celebrate Mother's Day but also a month for my sister and I celebrate our mother's birthday. I've always been closer to dad...maybe for being the eldest in the family but mom taught me a lot in life about LIFE...

I still remember my childhood and how mom (a housewife) run the family with dad's small wage. We stayed in a rural area surrounded by jungle with few neighbours. We had no electricity or water facility. Mom used to pump the "gas light" at 6.30 pm everyday and dad would fetch clean water at a market using his old cycle. We also had a well. At nights we're entertained by the cricket and frogs orchestra. No matter how poor we were...we never felt that. Because my parents showered us with so much LOVE. Thinking back, some would call ours a helluva childhood but i cherish it as the BEST. Eating under the moonlight was one great experience i had.

Mom was a strong women. She stayed home looking after her two children when her hubby works hard for the money. She made sure we had everything even when it means she don't have anything for herself. Mom was great. As i grew...i remember there were several times when i was being a jerk. I was rude to mom and treated her bad. Thank god i realized my mistakes soon and regreted everything I've done. I saw how blessed i was and hated myself for being the bad daughter. Now, i am doing everything i can to make my mom happy. After losing dad to cancer in 2004, my sis helped me in various ways to care for mum as I took over the role of dad. I learned a lot from my sister. She was younger than me but her strength was unbelieveable. Maybe she got it from mom.

Mom taught me of confidence, strength to achive the dream and love. I learned from the BEST. She's a living proof that nobody should use poverty as an excuse to stop living. Watching "Bersamamu" on Tv3...I smiled to myself..we've been in worst situation yet mom managed to make the best memories for us to cherish a lifetime. So...here's to you Amma...

Mom,

there are so many moments

when I wish you knew...

how much you matter to me,

and how much I thank you

for being such a wonderful mother

If there is happiness in my heart,

it's because you helped put it there.

If there is gentleness in my beliefs,

it's because you showed me how to care.

If there is understanding in my thinking,

it's because you shared your wisdom.

If there is a rainbow over my shoulder,

it's because of your outlook and your vision.

If there is a knowledge that I can reach out and

I really can make some dreams come true,

it's because I learned from the best teacher of all.

I learned... from you...

In the times of my life,

whether weare near or far,

please remember Mom,

that there could never be any mother

more wonderful...than the one you are..

Thank You Mom

Happy Mother's Day & Happy Birthday :)

I Love You Very Much

Thank You

Recently I was involved in arranging a programme for my division. During the time one of the staff came up to me and said "thank you, for arranging this programme. I'm happy to be here". It was a great compliment for me even tough it was merely few words uttered. My boss didn't say anything and i was not the least worried. Many were complaining that the service provided by the particular venue was not up to their satisfaction. Me, on the other hand turn deaf ears to all the criticism and kept making sure everything went well. At the end of the programme, a few came up and said thank you. Well..it felt good to be appreciated.

Saying "Thank You" is not always easy for everybody. Saying it with a smile is the best impression to give for someone who cares about you. When you received a gift ,you will not turn down your head and turn back, then decided to say the words "Thank You". Or saying the words without any facial expressions that what you say is real. Did you notice that some people hates to express gratitude but they are obligated to do it ,just to try to be nice or pretend that they like you or they like what you give and you can clearly see the facial expression to this person. His/her face does not coordinates the words she/he said. Thank you is free and pleasant to hear ,why can't you express it with your heart. Fake thank you are visible to your heart. You can tell the way the words uttered. Sweet thank you is priceless and genuine.Stop pretending to be nice ,be honest rather giving a fake smile. Some people will say,hmmmmm!!! wait a minute, is this gift worth to say "Thank You?" I would say that even if you do not like what you get but giving it to you with hearts are worth than having the things you like and given by a pretender. I rather happy with your gift if you give it to me heartily even if I do not like it. And you give me the gift that I really like the best but the way you give it is not genuine feelings. I go for the emotion when you hand me your gifts than looking of what is it you are giving. I say Thank You with respect and kind hearted.

Thank you ...for reading this :)

~Kahlil Gibran~

"One day you will ask me which is more important?

My life or yours?

I will say mine and you will walk away not knowing that you are my life."

~Kahlil Gibran~

Moving on with life....

Letting Go. Releasing. Moving on. These are words that come to mind when holding on to the status quo becomes too painful or takes too much energy. Even when we're ready, it's seldom easy to let go. But when we do, both we and the other person can become the people we were meant to be—loving without feeling we must control or be dependent on the other for our happiness. The healing and release we feel when we're finally able to truly let go can't happen, however, until we allow a shift to occur within us, until we're ready for a new way of looking at things, a perspective that is expressed very well in these lines...

To "let go" does not mean to stop caring. It means I can't do it for someone else.
To "let go" is not to cut myself off. It's the realization that I can't control another.
To "let go" is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.
To "let go" is not to try to change or blame another. It's to make the most of myself.
To "let go" is not to care for, but to care about.
To "let go" is not to fix, but to be supportive.
To "let go" is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.
To "let go" is not to be in the middle, arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own destinies.
To "let go" is not to deny, but to accept.
To "let go" is not to nag, scold, or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.

To "let go" is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.
To "let go" is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.
To "let go" is to fear less and to love more.

A very good indicator of wisdom, positive attitude as well as sound mental health is found in our capacity to let go. Life is a series of choices of how to behave. Often we make these choices automatically, without really being aware of what we are choosing or why. No matter who left who, if you loved him or her, you're hurting. There's no point in denying it and no future in wallowing in it. Letting go is simply making a decision – no longer to allow something from the past to influence your life now or to reduce your inner sense of peace and well-being....