One of the most difficult things to do in relationship is to listen--truly listen from your heart without blame, judgement or "you ought toos and you shoulds." It's also difficult to take the time to listen without allowing distractions to pull you away from what the other person is saying. It doesn't even matter if the person you are listening to is baring their soul or not, It's incredibly important to stay present, interested and focused on that person. All of us want to feel loved, respected and honored. And one way we have found to have this is to love, respect and honor someone else. We found that listening without interrupting the other shows respect and also builds trust. What a simple concept, but how hard it is to do. Something that is even more difficult to do is to listen to someone when it's uncomfortable to do so. When there are conflicts or resentments in a relationship that haven't been dealt with yet, there is an emotional charge that is present and that makes it difficult to stay focused on the present moment. In that time you're not really focused on the other person andwhat he or she is saying. You are focused on your emotions or your attempts to avoid pain. Another difficult situation is when you have preconceived prejudices and judgements of the person.Our judgements build walls even in the healthiest of relationships. When you are trying to listen to someone with whom there have been challenges, it requires you to listen with unconditional love in that moment. That doesn't mean you have to agree with everything they say. But, it does mean forgetting yourself and your issues while they are talking. We are so quick to rush in and prove we are right, that all we do is create more distance.Sometimes the greatest gift you can give someone is to just listen with your heart. So this week practice listening and coming from love in your relationships. When you do, you'll see a difference.
